Wednesday, January 07, 2009

Enough is enough!

I've had enough now. I've waffled enough shit on here about stuff that really should be kept private! But it felt bloody good to get it out. :)

I'm making the conscious decision to be happy and get over it. I have the love, comfort and support of so many special people but I'm the only one that can make the decision for me to be happy. So were the wise words of my little brother. My poor little brother who just went through the same thing 2 months ago. I have to take on board what advice I gave him, and listen to myself!

There will be more tears, there will be many more 'moments', but they have to be a small part of my day, not the whole of it.

I need to start to exercise again, I need to start eating again, I need to do everything that I can to make my body feel better, then my head should follow.

I have the answers that would have driven me crazy - I can start to have closure.

I have to forget my obsessive-compulsive tendancies and not let myself be obsessed with what 'could' have been. Coz it's never going to be. And I have a very special friend who will boot me up the ass if she sees that I'm wallowing. I needed that time to just cry and cry and think and over-analyse. But enough is enough. After 4 years I cannot waste any more days on a dead issue. Life is too short :)

Quote I read just recently:
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent".

11 comments:

Kek said...

That's the spirit!

I know you have it in you to get past this. Be prepared for some more tough times, but let your friends (and you have a lot) help you through it.

Hope you get a good night's sleep tonight.

XXX

Running Fan said...

Hi Selina

I Have followed your blog for a while and you have always been an inspiration to me health and fitness wise.

I went through the same thing as you many years ago. Together for 5 years, engaged, cheated with a girl (A real loser) and stayed with her for a month before he wanted to come crawling back. I felt as if in one second my whole future, my whole life had been taken away from me.

In hindsight,I have to say though it was the best thing that ever happened to me. I came out stronger, tougher and a better person. I beleived that I deserved better than this and would not accept anything less.

I am now happily married with a little girl. I am able to love and REALLY appreciate what I have in my life, and believe that I should be loved and appreciated just as much.I can look back and only thank God that I am not with this other guy anymore. Everything happens for a reason, and you are to GOOD for this guy.

As time passes you will look back and wonder how you could have wasted so many tears on such a loser.

Take care, be strong and really believe that you are TO GOOD FOR HIM, and he has lost the best thing that will every happen in his life.

Christine

Kristy said...

That's the attitude Selina, Go Girl!

Gillian said...

Good for you Selina!!! Start thinking about some goals you want to accomplish and really concentrate on having some 'you' time. Turn this into a real positive.

linda said...

There will be good and bad times and gradually there will be more good than the bad-it just takes time. Keep looking onward and upward and let your friends support you when you need it. hugs

Ronnie said...

Good for you chicky babe. You will be fine in time. We are all here for you whenever you need to vent.

ms_attitude said...

You poor angel. You WILL find someone who is worthy of you. The same thing happened to my sister - but this was her husband of 13 years who had been leading a double life for about 4 years. She has healed and loves again. You will too.
Big hugs and stay strong and positive. He doesn't deserve you, and you don't deserve that.

Lia Halsall said...

Looking forward isn't easy to do at times like these but we do it and for good reason. When you're strong enough you will look back and be able to deal with what you need to deal with. Until then, take care of yourself and do what you have to do.

Luv Lia xxx

little rene said...

Hey gorgeous girl! I am thinking of you at this extremely shitty time! Sorry I can't chat for too long as I am on holidays but I just wanted you to know that I am thinking of you and thinking that he is an absolute wanker for letting a quality human like you go :)
Look to your fanatstically happy future kiddo!
Take care of yourself xxx

Sara said...

Indeed, that IS the spirit. As I said, they did not deserve women such as us. ;) You are doing great!

Lia Halsall said...

Hi Selina,

Just letting you know that you need to delete me from your blog list and add me again now that I have a new isp address since moving my blog. It's www.liahalsall.com.

Lia xxx
Eat Clean, Drink Water, Train Hard & Love Life! :o)